Posted by Mindy Tulsi-Ingram on 4th Jul 2024

July Newsletter - How Kindness Turned a Rough Day Around

After landing from an exhausting trip home from Europe, which included 2 delays and flight cancellations, we went to Earls restaurant.

When I entered the restaurant. I asked the hostess how she was doing and how her day was going. The first thing she said to me was that no one had ever asked her about her day or how she was doing. She was touched that someone cared about her. She said that when customers came in, all they cared about was getting a table and being served, with no further communication.

It takes very little time and effort to acknowledge or inquire about others. Servers, delivery staff and service staff are often treated badly, and are expected to perform their best while pleasing and appeasing customers’ demands.

Everyone wants to be acknowledged and appreciated. Acknowledgement can uplift us and enrich our interactions, strengthening and deepening our connections with others. Simply asking about their day or how they are doing can turn into a pleasant experience for both parties. We can also learn something interesting about or from them.

Appreciation contributes positively to any relationship – be it a casual comment to a server in a restaurant, or to your partner, or to your boss or co-worker. Being polite and having a little patience can enhance our understanding of the other person and create positive outcomes.

We all thrive in an environment where we feel valued; it lessens anxiety and encourages us to ‘pay it forward’ to others. It could be a smile, a compliment, or a small act of kindness.

The science of persuasion tells us that we like people who compliment us, we like people who cooperate with us toward a mutual goal, and we want to reciprocate. Reciprocity - when we acknowledge others, they will acknowledge us back.

Simply put, people are appreciative and want to give back to others in the form of a behavior, a gift, or service that they have received first. The hostess asked me about my day and when I told her, she went out of her way to bring us sparkling water and she said, here’s a little bit of Italy!

To be persuasive in our everyday interactions we need to take the time to know who we are dealing with and to find out a little about their day or interests. I found out that our hostess loved hiking and that she felt great and rejuvenated from her hike the day before.

Being genuine and honest is essential to being persuasive. No one likes a fake. People gravitate toward those who are genuine. Use of positive language and being sincere are key – no one reacts well to someone who is pushy or judgemental.

Maintain a sincere tone even when you are rushed. Smiling can be a simple, yet impactful form of generosity - remember to ...

A smile will change the tone of your voice, even on the phone, making you sound warm, inviting and enthusiastic. Try saying something negative while smiling. You'll notice that your tone is more upbeat and positive than if you were saying it with a straight face or a frown. Next time you are on the phone, try smiling.

If you ask a question, wait and listen. Show interest in others while you stay mindful of how your actions affect them.

As you head out this summer for your vacation, and wherever your travels take you, treat others with kindness and patience. Notice the goodness around you.

Be safe and have a happy summer.

There is a fine line between a groove and a rut. So, what’s the difference?

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